tips to write college papers
- begin with “buckle your seatbelts, motherfuckers, because in eight short pages i am going to learn u a thing that i only learned myself about two hours ago, so sit down, shut up, and enjoy the experience of my 4-am-redbull-induced-self-hatred-fuelled-writing-extravaganza”
- erase when finished with the paper
BUT THIS ACTUALLY WORKS
MAKE SURE YOU ERASE IT THOUGH
- Person of Color: Racism is bad!
- Everybody: Yeah, so positive and brave! Go you!
- White person: I agree, racism it totally bad!
- Everybody: Fuck you, you don't get to say that! You're not a POC, you don't know what it's like!
- Queer Person: Homophobia is bad!
- Everybody: Omg so courageous four for you!
- Straight person: It is bad, we should do something to try and stop it.
- Everybody: Oh my god shut up you privileged asshole your opinion doesn't count because you're straight!
- Gender Queer Person: Transphobia is simply terrible.
- Everybody: So true you're an angel for speaking out!
- Cisgender Person: You're right, and I'm going to start a petition to have non-binary genders recognized legally!
- Everybody: Fuck you cis-scum oh my god i hope you die you don't deserve to support equality!
- Woman: Misogyny is disgusting!
- Everybody: Bless you for being you!
- Man: Women should be equal to men!
- Everybody: Ugh men just say that to get into girls' pants they should all go die and women should rule the world.
- Me: *logs off and moves to the moon*